read in: 12 min
by Marcus Muhammad (@BrotherMarcus)
Bismilliah Ir Rahman Ir Raheem
We give praise and thanks to Allah for those couples who are brave enough to continue to embark upon the union of marriage in 2013. For those of us who are willing to continue to fight for our marriages we already know that we will surely face many trials and problems in 2013. When we say I do, we shouldn’t take it lightly for many things will come to test our commitment and our word to God and to each other. Sometimes the trials of marriage are so strong that sometimes spouses want to leave their marriages. Our eyes and mind may wander and wonder what if we were with someone else because the grass always looks greener on the other side. We may wonder this year just ‘who in the hell’ are spouse is. They may wonder the same thing. This year our spouses may very well get on our last good nerve. This year, quite possibly, all hell may break out in our marriage. Hopefully we already know that marriage is a 24 hour 7 days a week job that we have to show up for every single day. While marriage is a full-time job the benefits we reap from successful marriages cannot be compared to anything else.
We have to learn how to better handle our marital trials as our trials are a necessity and an essential factor in our growth into our divinity. What are trials anyway? In clearing the word the Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan shared that a trial is that which brings forth from the person being tried what is hidden of both good and evil. Trials make manifest what is within. This is why Allah says that He will try the believers at least once a year – severely. Trials make manifest our defects and the manifestation of defects leads to the perfection of the human being. The Minister also shared that in the world of God and righteousness, trials are as necessary to the perfection of the human being as water is to the growth and development of life. Very few things in life can try us like marriage.
The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan said that trials are made to manifest two realities, strength and weaknesses. The commitment level of each couple is tested through the great periods of trial that manifest in marriages. The trials we experience may become so difficult that it can extinguish our desire to remain in a marriage. Even when we don’t choose divorce the trials may weaken us so thoroughly that we may begin to deviate in the marriage although we are still in the process of marriage. The difference between successful couples and unsuccessful couples is the way they handle the very natural trials that come up in every marriage. Everything can be a trial in the marriage if we let it be a trial. Successful couples understand that gems cannot be polished without friction, nor can marriages perfected without trials. Successful couples understand that if it were not for the hot water, the teakettle would not sing. They also understand that the trials that make some couples turn bitter on each other actually help to make other couples better. Successful couples understand, “When love is thick in the marriage, faults are thin and when faults are thick in the marriage love is very thin.” What some couples don’t seem to understand is that extraordinary trials are the very things that hold extraordinary marriages together! Successful couples are friends of one another and don’t tend to forget that!
We close this brief topic with the question, “Who do you put your faith and your trust in, in 2013?” Is your complete faith and trust in your husband or wife? Or is your faith and trust where it should be, in Almighty God Allah! The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan has shared with us that no Prophet of God escaped trials. He reminds us that the enemies of Abraham tried to boil Abraham in oil but that Allah was there with Abraham! He reminds us that Allah (God) was with Daniel in the lion’s den! He has taken the time to remind us who was in the fiery furnace with the three Hebrew boys and who it was that fed Elijah when Elijah was running in the wilderness! Since none comes to Allah (God), except as an honored servant, Allah (God) has always tried all of His Prophets, Messengers, and people severely in their journey toward Him. It is these trials and afflictions that are part and parcel of the journey of faith that makes the reward of that journey so soul satisfying. After completing these trials, we become a soul well pleased with Allah (God) and well pleasing in His sight. Since the institution of marriage is one half of faith, then, similar trials that are experienced in the journey of faith are also visited on those two souls that desire to become as one. After completion of many trials, the two become well pleased in the eyes of each other and well pleasing in the eyes of Allah (God). What a friend we have in Almighty God (Allah) and His Messenger! All of us have to learn to trust Allah (God) completely during our marriage trials – Remember He’s had trillions of years of experience!
Please join Brother Marcus and Sister Cecelia every Sunday evening at 8:00 p.m. EST as we conduct Marriage Strengthening Workshops and Singles Success Seminars online. Please visit: www.startmeeting.com/wall/644-850-753 for more information. Please connect with Brother Marcus via Facebook if we are not already friends at: www.facebook.com/brothermarcus.peace You may also call
404-542-3808 for more information about the 4th Annual Marriage Retreat which will be announced soon.