By Halimah Nia Muhammad, Muslim Fashion Designer
I didn’t think what I loved mattered. My self-esteem was sooooooo low that I did what I thought I should do. I did what I thought would be accepted. Immodesty was (and still is) popular so I embraced it. It didn’t matter what I thought of myself when I looked in the mirror, because what other people saw through their eyes meant more to me.
I wish I could stand before you and say that modesty is easy. I wish I could stand before you and say I want to dress this way all of the time. I wish I could stand before you and say I don’t wake up an outrageous amount of days and want take this scarf off of my head. There are days where I think “Why can’t I just be normal? Why do I have to be SO bold? Why can’t I just blend in?”. There are days so intense that I’m basically on the verge of tears and many times have cried. And it’s at that moment that no one sees me but Allah (God). It’s in that moment that I’m leaning solely on Him and calling out to Him asking, “Oh Allah make this easier for me. I know that this (modesty) is something You love, but I don’t love it like you love it but I want to. Please make me stronger. Please increase my faith in You. Help me be more confident in YOU and what You love”.
Any trial that brings us closer to Allah (God) is never a calamity…it’s ALWAYS a blessing. Embracing modesty or modest fashion develops TRUE beauty, real confidence and increases our relationship with Allah (God), which I’m learning is the ONLY relationship that matters.
We fight soooooo hard for love, friendship, success etc. and compromise ourselves in the process when Allah (God) has already promised us these things if we submit to Him! When you put your worth and value in the hands of other people, you will always be fighting to be good enough and NEVER will be. All the while, Allah (God) has already deemed us good enough if we submit to Him!
I’m learning that My relationship with Allah is what will grant me true and everlasting love. Modesty not only takes a man’s focus off of the physical but it takes MINE off the physical as well. I look in the mirror and I can’t feel good about myself based on my shape or hair. So if I am to be confident and feel beautiful, I find beauty within the depths of my mind and soul. It’s not that the body isn’t beautiful, because it is, but this world has put so so so much emphasis on physical beauty that internal beauty has become irrelevant. In actuality it’s really MORE important. My aim for modesty is my daily reminder of this.
Being a Covered Girl is a daily choice. Every day we must choose to allow our mind and soul to shine through as opposed to our bodies, and you CAN look stylish and fashionable while doing so!
Peace & Blessings,
Sister Halimah Nia Muhammad